How to make porridge

Two ingredients: best breakfast ever

I can’t cook and refuse to learn.

But I know three recipes: porridge, spag bol, and anything with 2 types of booze in it.

Porridge is my favourite. It’s simple, quick and has two ingredients. Neither are booze, but you can’t have everything.

Ingredients (serves 1)

1/2 cup porridge oats (Flahavan’s are the best.)

1 cup semi-skimmed milk


Pour the oats into a saucepan. Add the milk. Heat gently whilst stirring.

After 5-10 mins the porridge will start to thicken and turn into gorgeous, soupy, porridgey loveliness.

Then all you have to do is wait for the children to turn up and complain that you haven’t made pancakes.


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Breakfast of champions: the egg muffin

Egg muffin


1 breakfast muffin
1 egg
3-4 cocktail sausages


Small frying pan
Egg ring
Plastic slice
Bread knife

How to make

Split the egg muffin in half lengthways and pop in the toaster.

Meanwhile, stick a bit of heat under the frying pan. Put the egg ring in the frying pan ( you don’t need any butter or oil) and crack the egg into it. The egg will flow into a beautiful disc shape. Kick off your preferred coffee making routine. If you live in London, this will mean ordering a Starbucks via Uber Eats to be droned in through the kitchen window. Or stick the kettle on for a cup of instant.

Split the cocktail sausages and place, cut side down, next to the egg ring to heat through.
By now, the muffin should be toasting nicely. Hoik it out and butter it.
Arrange the cocktail sausages on the muffin and top with the egg once cooked through (2-3 minutes.)
Place the top half of the muffin and voila, a breakfast that will get you through an entire day of any number of children firing questions at you relentlessly.

Summer holidays


Pleased to report I’ve survived day one of the summer holidays.


It’s lovely around here. We moved in November but I don’t feel like I’ve had time to breathe for the last six months. Ferrying the kids backwards and forward to school, unpacking a million boxes and registering with local doctors and so on seems to have taken up all the time.

It’s nice to get to the point of having moved the kids to a school around the corner, albeit not until September.

Today we discovered a ‘secret passage’ which runs along the back of several houses next to ours. Excited to find a blackberry bush ready to be picked, the weather has been so good lately that they’ve all fruited early.

img_2563I’ve been walking every day, looking at people’s window boxes and hanging baskets and beautiful doors and so on.

This area of London is super urban yet right behind the high street is a beautiful village complete with church, playing fields and loads of gorgeous old houses.

The children seem to be enjoying a chance to relax after weeks on end of me screaming “COME ON!” at them at 8am, trying to usher them into the car in time to get to school before the bell rings.

My alarm clock will be set to 7 rather than 6am on Monday, and let me tell you, that feels like a holiday.

How are you getting on? Are your kids off school yet? What plans do you have for the holidays? If not, what else is new?

New digs

Wow, it’s been a long time. My last post here was December 2012. Since then we’ve moved a few stops down the tube line to Morden, had another baby and quit my job at the BBC to become a full time Mum. Lots of change.

I feel like I’ve been moving house for a year, but today marks the end of that process. The kids will go to their ‘old’ school for the last time this morning. They’ll be round the corner from September. Once I pick them up today and bring them home I’ll feel like we’ve finally landed.

I’m hoping that over the summer break I’ll pick up the blog again. I find writing relaxing as well as a good way to process things. So many times in the process of writing I’ve found out what I really think. Thanks for being my therapists!

Big cities are simultaneously overwhelming and isolating, so it’s good to have a outlet to connect with people. If you’re overseas, please say hi. If you have a blog, let me know where I can read it. I’ve been out of the loop for a few years so need to build up my reading list again.

Thanks for sticking with me through the mega-outage! What’s new with you?


They really are everywhere. I know I mentioned this before, but it is astonishing given that it is now, *checks watch* December 11th*.

The builders don’t have much choice, mind. Their boss, a no-nonsense Kiwi who took half a meter off our bathroom when England beat the All Blacks 38-21, has told them in no uncertain terms that ‘long pants’ are a sign of weakness, and that anyone wearing them will be sent home to change. So I see knees wherever I go. Knees climbing past my living room window, knees dangling at eye level as I duck into the kitchen… knees, knees, knees. Slightly shivering knees now, it has to be said, but they show no sign of wavering on this one. I wonder whether the depths of Winter will inspire a change of heart.

The builders on top of the knees are very pleasant, convivial types who swear like dockers but bellow ‘language’ at each other whenever they think I might be in earshot. One of them even says ‘pardon’ which I thought had entirely slipped out of general usage.

Anyway, the good news is that the loft is nearly finished, and we should soon be free of dust, more dust and not being able to find a teaspoon for love or money, which seems to be a daily occurrence at the moment.

The boys are enjoying the chaos, thrilled that we’re building them a naughty step and have ramped up the behaviour accordingly. In case this is my last post before Christmas, wishing you all a very merry festive season and all the best for 2013.

*Must write Christmas cards.